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Talkin' Shit: The Crack Emcee

 

GUEST EDITORIAL
The Crack Emcee speaks up on current events- from gay marriage to terrorism- and takes a turn trash-talking those cheese-eating French. (He's travelling back to France for an extended stay starting next week - editor)

    "Crack Emcee to the Underground: ain't seen you 'round - are you out there, somewhere? And, if so, who dares speak? We on the streets to see,..."

    from Hoin' For George by The Crack Emcee
When I wrote that, the Left was too scared by all the flag-wavin' to say anything about the build-up to war (and, despite wonderful reviews and some Best Album Of The Year nominations, to give much support to Rap's Creation (Planet Rock), my "radical" little album,....) so, feeling rejected (for speaking out too early, I told myself) and hearing, over and over, that the French were the "New Democrats" - The Real Democrats, even - I took my black ass over to France. I wanted to be around people who were as mad as I was; people who spoke out early. People who believed in something - and stood up for that shit - even when nobody else "hard" was ready.

Of course (on the ground) with their bread-wine-and-cheese lifestyle, the French weren't REALLY gettin' outraged by much, except for Arabs (and thinking they got an ever-declining quality in the bread-wine-and-cheese. Think about it: they got strikes, all the time, and everybody just TAKES it,...), so it didn't take long for my ever-wired American ass to itch for comin' back Stateside. Like James Baldwin, I knew what I didn't like about the U.S. - and France - and (damn it) I had to come "home".

Now comes the good part: what did I find when I returned? Well (along with DVDs of the first seasons of The Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and Bullshit - I ain't got cable) my beloved San Francisco was, finally, screaming like someone had slipped a real war under the door but, unfortunately - along with, still, not buyin' my album - those screams were much too fuckin' loud and much too fuckin' late to matter. And even worse, most of the time, I could see where committed Leftists (JUST like George W. Bush) let "activists" (JUST like Dick Cheney) help them argue for the wrong fuckin' shit (for instance, like, wasn't San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom supposed to turn into a Nazi when he got to power?). And, in wartime, I think that shit's just fuckin' sad.
    "You said Abe Lincoln wanted slaves to be free? Liar! You said this country was 'sposed to matter to me! Liar!"

    from Democracy Sucks! by The Crack Emcee's 'Little White Radio'
People are STILL askin' dumb shit like why we went to Iraq. (Don't y'all know this shit yet? Go watch Three Kings again, and ask yourself: if Ice Cube wanted to help the Iraqi people, what's your fuckin' problem?) It makes you think. Seems to me, I know a whole bunch of people, who've listened to Dr. Dre their whole fuckin' lives, who've, all of a sudden, got gun shy. Well, not me. I ain't no sucka, or a poser, or a liar. I'm known for THIS shit - but I just ain't buyin' what y'all's sellin' this time: is Bush (not "President Bush", or "W.", or even "George Bush" - just this "Bush") really stupid? Even as he walks over Democrats, like Clinton used to walk over Republicans? How does that work again? Bein' an idiot - and kickin' your ass? Or do you really think Bush & Cheney KILLED THEIR FRIENDS on 9/11 to make more oil money? Really? Boy, they must be some hard mothafuckas. And speakin' of hard, do the French hate what our country's doin'? Really? You sure about that?

And why is the Left screamin' about Bush and the Christian Right wantin' to stop Gays from marrying? Big Fuckin' Deal. They also wanted the 10 Commandments placed in the courthouses. They didn't get it. And they won't get this either. There's already been cases in Texas and elsewhere, that prove the Christians can't win this, so why are y'all gettin' so fuckin' worked up about it? I'm an Athiest and I'm cool on it. They can't win. Can't you EVER laugh at 'em? After bein' Americans, for your entire fuckin' lives, have you no faith in anything? I'd feel dirty now - and I think, some of you should too - when you're 'sposed to be an intelligent person and you're walkin' around sayin', "You can't win a 'War On Terrorism' because terrorism is a tactic" - when you KNOW you're takin' the piss over words. The damn TITLE of the thing. That's just cheap.
    "You don't sound like the same guy that did 'Pow!'!"

    a fan of my music with the Broun Fellinis, in a recent conversation
Yep, I've heard enough shit-talkin'. I heard Osama bin Laden called blacks "slaves", and I heard Bob Woodward say HE thought Saddam had WMD - and everybody else (France, Germany, etc.) did too, so, if you trust Bob, there was no "lie" - and, finally, I already said my peace BEFORE THE WAR STARTED and, yep, I think it's too late for this pissing contest, now that we got guys out there fighting. That's where I am: our side. Like I said, I know what I don't like about the U.S. but (damn it) we're in this shit and - Fuck You - I want us to win, if only so we can keep talkin' shit when we want to. Even crazy shit.

And, especially, when nobody else cares to listen.
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